I used my previous beard bonding experience to chat with him. I told him I dug the mohawk, and showed him mine. I then told him I've been approached by a couple different guys who claimed we were beard bros, but what I really wanted out of this whole thing was to find my mohawk bro. THIS SOUNDS SUPER FUCKING AWKWARD, RIGHT?!?!
These complexes really take over, man. I'm sure it's something nearly everybody lives with, but I need to just get out of my head, and possibly out of this bathroom stall. Pretty sure the guy next to me is throwing up, so at least I'm not feeling as bad as he is. That's good right?
I've kind of fallen into a groove, and I don't think that's good. It's damn near the same thing every week. Monday, relax hardcore, because shit's about to get wild. Tuesday, work my normal 10-11 hours, come home, edit Ad Astra, finish up JUST IN TIME to start recording Reminiscent, and pray to Elon Musk that you're in bed before midnight, wake up at 5am for work. Wednesday and Thursday is dedicated to editing Reminiscent (so many censorship bleeps), then Friday-Sunday, I'm desperately trying to find productive things to do for the network, website, but I'm so burnt out I kind of just watch Netflix and stare blankly at my iPhone, switching between Twitter, Instagram, and Facebook. Sprinkled in there is recording/editing/and mixing for the Straight Up podcast. When I'm not doing those things, I like to type the longest run on sentences in the world.
Over the past year, with a huge move across the country, arriving in a new state where I had no job and no place to live, and just trusting I can make it work, I've learned to just stay calm and handle situations in the order of importance. I've grown a lot this year, and if I hadn't matured in the ways that I have, I believe this network would have already failed.
If you love space and space related topics, you need to check out this show. These guys are absolutely brilliant and it's such an honor to be producing this show for them. I learn so many new and interesting things every time they send me a new episode for editing.
There are people I work with at UPS that say, "This job isn't so bad. It's hard work but it's a job. Yeah it only pays $10.15/hour and you have to work (5) 3.5 hour days, but it's not THAT bad. So this is where I might piss some people off. I think these people are fucking lying to themselves.
I kind of miss seeing hundreds of friends in my Facebook timeline posting about their band and being able to chime in. I know no one will ever care as much about what I created as I do, but I really need some people in my life who are pursuing similar interests. I miss the camaraderie, the community, the way we fed off each other's progress, because right now I'm fucking starving.
We'll get there in time, however. There's no way the shows are going to air in the next few weeks, so I'm not stressing it. I'm trying to just keep my head down and keep working no matter what. I still don't know the purpose of this blog post, but whatever, I'm sticking with it.
All I've ever wanted was to be able to entertain and educate people. I don't think I'm enough of an expert on any 1 subject, but I wasn't willing to give up on the dream. I knew I could sit humbly in the background and help other people make their dream of being a podcaster/entertainer/content creator/topic master come true.
I had no idea what I was trying to say when I started all of this, but I guess what it ended up being is that if you want something bad enough, make it happen, by any fucking means necessary. Don't be afraid to email people out of the blue.